Life Unscripted is a category that I chose specifically that discusses topics that we are facing and navigating in our lives. The difficulties we go through and share those experiences with other people. As a multiracial individual, I have faced numerous challenges and situations that made me question everything that I was taught and how I perceive the world. Society pressure individuals to have everything figured out by a certain age (in my opinion 30). Just to clarify it a bit further, when I mean have everything figured out, I mean HAVE EVERYTHING FIGURED OUT.
Your finances, relationships, career, spirituality and religion and your mental health. If you want to have children, if you have children, RAISE them properly, understand your sexuality and being confident in your life and have it ALL FIGURED OUT. I don’t know how you guys feel about that, but I know that the economy alone cannot allow a fraction of what is expected of us. To be financially stable is out of the question. Let alone have a steady and stabilized (Healthy) relationship. Whether we like to admit to ourselves, finances play such a crucial role in how we view our relationships.
To be financially free means to have a stable relationship with money and with your mental health. If there are stressors in that trio, that the illusion of stability sets in. if I can just make it until my pay day, Ill be alright. How many times have we said this to ourselves. MORE TIMES THAN I CAN COUNT! The illusion sets in, I can do it if I can just… blah blah blah. Making the excuse to just get to the next distention is not having everything figured out.
Let’s just sit here for a minute and think about that. Society wants us to have it all figured out but places us in a strained economic situation where we are living paycheck to paycheck just to re-live the illusion of stability. THAT IS THE DEFINITION OF INSANITY. To continue to do the same thing repeatedly desiring for a different outcome. But the different outcome never comes. So, we are stuck in this cycle of never-ending prayer to pay day just to have your money sucked up within three days to the lovely thing called BILLS. It’s scary to be an adult during these times and that might be a cliché to say but it’s something I am having trouble navigating. Understanding what financial freedom is and how do I need to do to achieve it. Coming from my background, I don’t have the help that some mothers have such as financial stability or even family members for support.
I rely on my husband for that support, which I am entirely grateful for in that regard, however is it enough? It’s okay to say that you need more support, however even having the strength and courage to say that “I need support” is draining in of itself. Plus, you don’t even know if you would even receive support once communicating your concerns. It’ s difficult to live up to expectations that you didn’t set up for yourself. However, WHY SHOULD YOU LISTEN TO THE GENERATION THAT CAUSED YOU TRUAMA?! This is a question/statement that I ask myself when I begin to look at my goals vs expectations. We all have different situations, and we all have different perspectives.
Why should we validate ourselves from the previous generation to know that we are doing the best we can. It causes additional stress and low sense of worth. It creates self-inflicting doubt in yourself as an adult that has been navigating this horrendous economy. Why even put us through that? We want approval and acceptance. It’s natural to want approval and acceptance from your parents, why not from society. We don’t want to have negative connotations upon ourselves… bad mother…lazy…liar.
To what degree though? Why do I need to fulfill this self-impeding expectation to satisfy the needs of a concept (society). When you break it down like this it sounds ridiculous. I don’t even care about my own parents’ expectations of myself, why am I putting myself through stress and doubt for a concept’s (society) expectation? Have you ever heard the saying that money doesn’t buy you happiness…..I will be the judge of that. Money can buy me financial freedom to live stress free and be happy. Money will always be the definitive factor in relationships and self-improvement (growth).
We were raised on an illusion that if you have love you have it all, if you have happiness, you will be satisfied. NO! ABSOULTLY NO! The parents and the previous generation that live off that fanatical notion have HOUSES AND MONEY IN THE BANK. They have stability which individuals in my generation (millennials) don’t have at this moment. So again, I ask myself the question and I challenge my readers to think. WHY LISTEN TO THE GENERATION THAT HAS CAUSED US TRAUMA.
